World Domination Christmas

It seems like it’s the same thing every year, I will ask my father what he wants for Christmas and every year he says he wants world peace. Needless to say this makes shopping for him a little hard. This year he did the same thing and I finally decided that I was going to do something about it.

It has long been my intention to take over the world, a life time goal you could say. I thought it was the least I could do to speed up these plans to give my father what he wanted for Christmas. After all if I ruled the whole world then it would be at peace, because it would be under my control. With the world united there would be no reason for wars.

I go to a college in a very small town no one has ever heard of, so my first step was to take over the college. I figured since no one really cares about the town it would be unlikely that I would be found out. That would make the perfect launching point for my scheme. It did mean that I had to win over the faculty and students of the college however.

It was the make up of the school’s population that inspired me. I had my own army simply by suggesting a world where everything was powered by renewable energy and sizable subsidies for farmers. I won’t claim that this made everyone in the school join my cause, but it got a sizable portion, and we held those who wouldn’t join us in the basement of the humanities faculty office building. There were plenty of small windowless cells down there to choose from.

In order to keep our plans hidden all of the faculty who had joined our cause were asked to continue attending conferences. The PR departments for the university were among the people who had refused to join us so I combined the people in the political science department with the communication department to take care of press statements and dealing with the outside world.

It was the science department that played the biggest part in my plans however. Even if I had managed to win over everyone in the whole college I still wouldn’t have had much of an army. This meant that I would have to rely on brains rather then brawn. It also occurred to me that sinking our modern world into war would be exactly what my father didn’t want. There was only one solution to this, time travel. A small army with modern technology would easily defeat the world armies of the past, and it would mean that the war could be over a long time before my father was born. I set the science division the job of building the time machine and busied myself with the basics.

Money was of course a problem. The tuition was no longer going to the classrooms, so that was some help, but my army still needed to be fed and housed which cost me a lot of that. That made me look to what else I could take money from. The first thing I took funding from was the wilderness restoration fund, under the general idea that wilderness happened so long as you left it alone long enough and it shouldn’t cost money to leave some land alone. The next thing I did was sell a lot of the university’s desks and furniture which helped some. I kept the computers, which would have earned me a lot because the science department told me that they needed them, but the projectors all went.

To be continued...